Dad's Army - The Test

This piece is not about bats.  I’m taking the liberty to remind those who have never seen it to watch an episode of Dad's Army called 'The Test'. It's episode 10 in series 4, and is the funniest dramatised game of cricket you will ever see. Granted that humour is subjective, and you might say "what's funny about a bunch of old men playing cricket badly". But for lovers of cricket and classic situation comedy it should bring a big smile to your face, and maybe a few titters. Yes it's dated, being first broadcast in 1970, but there's much that is familiar to us today because after all it's a cricket match, played then as it is now. I challenge anyone who has played village cricket not to recognise something of themselves, or an experience that resonates in The Test.


Here is a piece of dialogue between Captain Mainwaring, and Mr Yeatman the Verger who has been roped in to umpire. There is no love lost between them Mainwaring thinks Yeatman is an idiot, and Yeatman thinks Mainwaring is a pompous up-start.  Mainwaring waddles in to bowl and on delivering his dolly sparks the following exchange:

Yeatman:  No ball!
Mainwaring [perplexed]:   That was my googly.
Yeatman:   Well, from where I was standing it was a chuck....and don’t argue with the umpire or you’ll be sent off.
Mainwaring:   You don’t send people off in cricket.
Yeatman:   I do.
Mainwaring:   I suppose I’m very lucky not to be given offside.
Yeatman:  I’m taking your name for that Mainwaring [writes in his notebook] gross impertinence and sarcasm.

Of course, it’s much funnier on screen, and if you need proof, YouTube has the episode for viewing; in three parts because of the 10min limit on clips. Just search on Dad’s Army The Test.